


I Bet It Stung

by tattedmariposa



Category: Persona 4
Genre: Jealousy, M/M, Pre-Relationship, Resentment, Uncertainty, Underage Drinking, serious talk, working past problems
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-04
Updated: 2015-03-04
Packaged: 2018-03-16 06:05:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3477263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tattedmariposa/pseuds/tattedmariposa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the team's misadventures at Club Escapade, Yu talks Yosuke into skipping out on their curfew, getting lost in Port Island, and trying something he's never done before. It's not nearly as fun as it sounds.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Bet It Stung

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this for a meme that was going around on tumblr: the prompt was "things you said when you were drunk." (Also writing shitty teenaged boys having feelings is really hard and I suck at it. Sorry about that.)

The cool night air feels great after a few hours of Club Escapade's close quarters and questionable refreshments. And evidently Yu thinks so too, because he turns to Yosuke, with eyes that are too bright and a flash of a grin that just looks _weird_ on him, and says, "Hey. Let's go for a walk."

He's touching Yosuke's wrist and everyone else is far down the block already, weaving past others on the sidewalk and crossing the street, and goddamn but he feels so dumb right then for not moving too, for just freezing there between a streetlamp post and a neon storefront. Yu's fingers linger on his skin like it's nothing ( _nothing_ , he tells himself) and for a moment, even in this bright city, he feels just as small as he ever did in Inaba.

"A walk?" he echoes. "To where? We're supposed to be back by eleven, remember?"

Yu pauses then too, tilts his head in a way that says _I know_ and asks Yosuke if he's okay with it, with electric blue and pink catching in his eyes and that damned smile again, and every objection Yosuke might've had ( _where_ and _why_ and _did you even hear what Naoto-kun said_ ) wilts in the back of his throat.

They walk in silence for a little bit, in a different direction from the hotel - and, well, it's not like he particularly wants to go back there anyway. At first he's content to just take in his surroundings, in the tandem comfort and thrill of being in a place that doesn't die with the sunset for the first time in far too long. But then they're several blocks along, and he doesn't quite know where they are anymore, and neither of them has said a word.

He wonders if Yu has noticed too. And if Yu has noticed, why he hasn't said or done anything about it, and if he isn't saying anything what that could possibly mean, and before he knows it he's glaring at the back of his friend's shoulders for no particular reason.

Maybe that's not quite true though. Yosuke thinks, not for the first time that evening, that he isn't sure he likes Yu like this. He's used to Yu's particular brand of quiet by now, but this isn't the same. Not after blowing off their curfew for a stupid reason, or after spending the night more animated than Yosuke's ever seen him before, probably - joking around with everyone, indulging the even the craziest of Rise and Yukiko's weird drunken whims. (He doesn't think about being a little jealous, because he's not sure who he's even jealous of anymore.)

Maybe it's unfair of him ( _selfish_ , his traitor brain helpfully supplies) to be stuck on how it's usually the other way around - how it's usually with _him_ that Yu lets loose a little, smiles more, laughs at his own awful jokes. It's not like he doesn't want Yu to have other friends or something, or to be able to laugh with anyone else, or act like a dumb teenager every once in a while. It's just-- 

He watches Yu's back and struggles to put a name to it in his own head. But his fingers find the back of his wrist without thinking about it at first, and even though he jerks away the second he realizes what he's doing, forcing his hands guiltily into his pockets, it still feels like Yu might somehow sense it just by--

"Hey."

Yu's stopped, turning to look at him for the first time since they were outside of the club. They're in a quieter part of the city now, near the entrance to what seems to be a shrine. Yosuke follows Yu's gaze, where it's wandered up the stairs and into the wide gap between a wooden fence. It's a lot bigger than the one back home - of course he can't help but compare the two.

"What's up?" Yosuke asks after a few seconds, because Yu hasn't said anything else. There's another stretch of silence before he does, and it feels almost like he's hesitating. 

"There's a playground."

It doesn't look like anything special, from where Yosuke's standing - a jungle gym, a seesaw, a small slide and a swingset. He leans to one side, tries to get a glimpse of whatever it is he must be missing, and completely fails to see whatever it was that stopped Yu in his tracks. 

Which must be why he's following Yu up the stairs a few moments later, across the broad path and into the playing area. Sand is definitely getting into his expensive sneakers and he's about to complain, but Yu says something first.

"Let's go on the swings."

Yosuke looks them over from a short distance, and they still don't impress him in the least. He thinks it goes without saying that Yu is decidedly too tall for the child-sized seats. 

"Yeah, sure," he says dryly, rolling his eyes at the back of Yu's head. "Maybe I should push you."

Of course it's just his shitty luck that that's exactly what happens. Yu carefully folds his too-long legs under himself and off of the sand as he sits, and Yosuke glances nervously at the rusted chains, creaking as they are already. He spreads his palms wide and flat against Yu's back, and when he feels the warmth of Yu's skin under the fabric of his shirt, he can't help but stare at his wrist again. He pushes, then again, then again and again and again, and all of a sudden Yu laughs, out of nowhere.

"This is great!" Yu tells him, a little breathlessly, over his shoulder. He's smiling a little too, and Yosuke's not sure if it's the softer light here or the time that's passed, or hell, maybe his own idiotic wishful thinking, but he thinks that maybe Yu looks a tiny bit more like himself. He shakes his head, and despite himself, finds his own mouth quirking at the corners.

"If you say so, man." It's just a swing, he thinks, but he keeps pushing anyway.

They keep on like that for a bit, but eventually Yu digs his heels into the sand, skipping a few times before skidding to a stop. "It's your turn," Yu tells him, looking over his shoulder again. And it's funny to him, somehow, that even when Yu is being totally incomprehensible, he still manages to be considerate. But even so, Yosuke shakes his head.

"I think I'm good, partner."

The word slips out of his mouth without him thinking about it, but he wonders when he stopped being mad, or if he was actually mad in the first place. Mostly he's just not sure what to think about this night at all anymore. Instead he takes a seat on the second swing and thinks about checking the time on his cell phone, or how much trouble they're going to be in if they're caught sneaking in late. He's halfway through reaching into his pocket when he realizes Yu is looking at him from the side.

"You know, I've never done this before."

Yosuke stops, blinks, leaves his phone where it is. He sure as hell hadn't been expecting that.

"What, you mean at the club earlier? Or the part where we completely blew off our curfew?" He watches as Yu tucks his feet in again, so he can hang freely. 

"Both." Yu smiles again. When Yosuke watches closer his eyes still seem somewhat clouded, maybe, and he's not sure what to think. "But also this," Yu adds, gesturing toward the swingset's rusted metal beams. "Even with having to keep my legs folded the whole time… it's fun."

"What? Seriously, you've never been on a swing before?"

He thinks a second too late that maybe he shouldn't have asked. A second is all it takes for him to remember a scattering of certain things Yu has said before, and a few other things that Yosuke's picked up on his own.

"Well," Yu replies thoughtfully, like he's considering it for the first time, "I suppose I always kept to myself, when I was in schools with playgrounds like this."

"And your parents never took you to one either?"

Pause. "No," Yu replies, after a moment. "No, they didn't."

Yosuke isn't sure why he said that either, and this time, when another pause stretches into a silence long enough for him to notice the noise coming off the street, and Yu doesn't do much of anything but stretch his legs out straight in front of him and stare at his own feet - yeah, Yosuke's pretty certain that he should've just kept his big mouth shut. He grips onto the chains at either side for a second, just for something to fiddle with in his embarrassment, but they immediately feel grimy to the touch so he tries for his cell phone again instead. It turns out to be a little past midnight. It's a small silver lining, he decides, but at least he hadn't spent the past hour thinking about magic TVs, for a change.

"Yosuke."

"Hm?"

"Thanks."

That's more than enough to pull his attention away from his cell phone screen, and from the scattering of missed _WHERE R U?????_ texts from their other friends. "What for?"

"I don't know. I know I haven't exactly… acted like my usual self tonight. But it feels good. To do something different, for a little while."

He watches Yu carefully, trying to pick up on something in the stiff set of his shoulders, or the white of his knuckles where his fingers wind tightly around the chains of his own swing. Yu, unsurprisingly, doesn't seem to mind the state they're in half as much as Yosuke did himself.

"So for… coming with me, I guess. And listening to me. And not saying anything about it."

Yosuke's cell phone is slack in his hand by then, time and texts and missed curfew momentarily forgotten. He struggles with what to say next, half because he doesn't want to make Yu feel worse with his huge mouth again, and half because his _unbelievably_ stupid ass had never stopped to consider, in all the possible doubts that ran through his head earlier, that maybe Yu wasn't actually treating him differently or keeping him at an arm's length all of a sudden - but the complete opposite. Yu had been showing trust in him, and this whole time he had been so--

"You're a good friend, Yosuke."

( _Selfish_ , that same bitter part of his mind snapped back at him.)

"No. I'm really not," he insists weakly.

"Then you've been playing the part well." 

And even though he gets that Yu is only teasing, in that weirdly calm way of his, Yosuke nearly winces. The unintentional ring of truth feels like a slap in the face. Much like earlier, Yu seems unusually wrapped up in himself, too much so to notice that anything's amiss. But this time Yosuke knows better than to hold it against him.

"Really though. Thank you." Yu pauses, drops one hand and brings the other to the back of his neck. "And uh. If we end up getting in trouble for this, I'll make it up to you, somehow. I promise."

A handful of flippant replies come to mind - a few weeks of homemade lunches, maybe, or a free term paper or two - but something about the way Yu's staring at his own shoes in the sand makes Yosuke hold his tongue. So instead he reaches out into the space separating the pair of swings, and brushes Yu's shoulder with his fingertips. He's not brave enough to reach for Yu's hand or even his wrist (not that it would mean anything, he tells himself) but the way Yu exhales, like letting he's letting go of a sigh that he's been holding in for a while, makes Yosuke feel at least a little better. 

"Hey, no worries," he says with an ease he doesn't entirely feel, while he hopes that the grin he's plastered on his face convinces at least one of them. Next time, though - next time, he's going to mean every last bit of it. He silently swears it, both to Yu and to himself, right then and there. "Anytime, partner."


End file.
